Good-frikkin-ness.
"I want you to know that I'm happy for you. I want nothing but the best for you both." - Alanis
NO. I went to sleep two years ago, and when I awoke and tried to catch up with the world I thought had left me behind, I discovered that I had somehow managed to live my life without my actually being too intimately involved in it. (And you thought 'querida' wasn't an adjective...) Well, now I'm sitting here in front of moody Molly, my re-conditioned laptop of a year and a half, and the day outside my window is so beautiful that it could almost be a U2 song, and yet I somehow feel like I am covered in rain, from head to toe. I am feeling like I have lost something I am not entirely sure I ever had to begin with. I just can't help feeling like something is missing. Is it the friends I did not think would cease to be the friends I thought they were once we were no longer in the exact same places in our lives? Is it the free-spirited hair on my head that I cannot seem to tame? Is it my unfinished novel, or my incomplete series of children's books? Is it every broken relationship I have ever had in my life? Is it all? Is it none? Will I ever really know? Will I just kind of float through the rest of my life, slipping in and out of times when I do and don't care what the answers to any of these questions are? What will become of me, really, eventually? And how will I know I am living the right way when I finally let go and let myself truly live?


These are just the things I wonder when no one else is looking...